The Saint and the Happy Highwayman s-21 Read online

  He caught the eye of a waiter at the other end of the dining car and beckoned him over.

  "Could you stand a drink?" he suggested.

  "Scotch for me," said Mr Naskill gratefully. He wiped his face again while Simon duplicated the order. "But I'm still talking about myself. If I'm boring you----"

  "Not a bit of it." The Saint was perfectly sincere. "I don't often meet anyone with an unusual job like yours. Do you know any more tricks?"

  Mr Naskill polished a pair of horn-rimmed spectacles, fitted them on his nose and hitched himself forward.

  "Look," he said eagerly.

  He was like a child with a new collection of toys. He dug into another of his sagging pockets, which Simon was now deciding were probably loaded with enough portable equipment to stage a complete show, and hauled out a pack of cards which he pushed over to the Saint.

  "You take 'em. Look 'em over as much as you like. See if you can find anything wrong with 'cm. . . . All right. Now shuffle 'em. Shuffle 'em all you want." He waited. "Now spread 'em out on the table. You're doing this trick, not me. Take any card you like. Look at it-- don't let me see it. All right. Now, I haven't touched the cards at all, have I, except to give 'em to you ? You shuffled 'em and you picked a card without me helping you. I couldn't have forced it on you or anything. Eh? All right. Well, I could put any trimmings I wanted on this trick--any fancy stunts I could think up to make it look more mysterious. They'd all be easy because I know what card you've got all the time. You've got the six of diamonds."

  Simon turned the card over. It was the six of diamonds.

  "How's that?" Naskill demanded gleefully.

  The Saint grinned. He drew a handful of cards towards him, face downwards as they lay, and pored over the backs for two or three minutes before he sat back again with a rueful shrug.

  Mr Naskill chortled.

  "There's nothing wrong with your eyes," he said. "You could go over 'em with a microscope and not find anything. All the same, I'll tell you what you've got. The king of spades, the two of spades, the ten of hearts----"

  "I'll take your word for it," said the Saint resignedly. "But how on earth do you do it?"

  Naskill glowed delightedly.

  "Look," he said.

  He took off his glasses and passed them over. Under the flat lenses Simon could see the notations clearly printed in the corners of each card--KS, 2S, 10H. They vanished as soon as he moved the glasses and it was impossible to find a trace of them with the naked eye.

  "I've heard of that being done with coloured glasses," said the Saint slowly, "but I noticed that yours weren't coloured."

  Naskill shook his head.

  "Coloured glasses are old stuff. Too crude. Used to be used a lot by sharpers but too many people got to hear about 'em. You couldn't get into a card game with coloured glasses these days. No good for conjuring, either. But this is good. Invented it myself. Special ink and special kind of glass. There is a tint in it, of course, but it's too faint to notice." He shoved the cards over the cloth. "Here. Keep the lot for a souvenir. You can have some fun with your friends. But don't go asking 'em in for a game of poker, mind."

  Simon gathered the cards together.

  "It would be rather a temptation," he admitted. "But don't you get a lot of customers who buy them just for that?"

  "Sure. A lot of professionals use my stuff. I know 'em all. Often see 'em in the shop. Good customers--they buy by the dozen. Can't refuse to serve 'em--they'd only get 'em some other way or buy somewhere else. I call it a compliment to the goods I sell. Never bothers my conscience; Anybody who plays cards with strangers is asking for trouble, anyway. It isn't only professionals, either. You'd be surprised at some of the people I've had come in and ask for a deck of readers --that's the trade name for 'em. I remember one fellow ..."

  He launched into a series of anecdotes that filled up the time until they had to separate to their compartments to collect their luggage. Mr Naskill's pining for company was understandable after only a few minutes' acquaintance; it was clear that he was constitutionally incapable of surviving for long without an audience.

  Simon Templar was not bored. He had already had his money's worth. Whether his friends would allow him to get very far with a programme of card tricks if he appeared before them in an unaccustomed set of horn-rimmed windows was highly doubtful; but the trick was worth knowing, just the same.

  Almost every kind of craftsman has specialized journals to inform him of the latest inventions and discoveries and technical advances in his trade, but there is as yet no publication called the Grafter's Gazette and Weekly Skulldugger to keep a professional freebooter abreast of the newest devices for separating the sucker from his dough, and the Saint was largely dependent on his own researches for the encyclopedic knowledge of the wiles of the ungodly that had brought so much woe to the chevaliers d'industrie of two hemispheres. Mr Naskill's conversation had yielded a scrap of information that would be filed away in the Saint's well-stocked memory against the day when it would be useful. It might lie fallow for a month, a year, five years, before it produced its harvest: the Saint was in no hurry. In the fulness of time he would collect his dividend--it was one of the cardinal articles of his faith that nothing of that kind ever crossed his path without a rendezvous for the future, however distant that future might be. But one of the things that always gave the Saint a particular affection for this story was the promptness with which his expectations were fulfilled.

  There were some episodes in Simon Templar's life when all the component parts of a perfectly rounded diagram fell into place one by one with such a sweetly definitive succession of crisp clicks that mere coincidence was too pallid and anemic a theory with which to account for them--when he almost felt as if he was reclining passively in an armchair and watching the oiled wheels of Fate roll smoothly through the convolutions of a supernaturally engineered machine.

  Two days later he was relaxing his long lean body on the private beach of the Roney Plaza, revelling in the clean sharp bite of the sun on his brown skin and lazily debating the comparative attractions of iced beer or a tinkling highball as a noon refresher, when two voices reached him sufficiently clearly to force themselves into his drowsy consciousness. They belonged to a man and a girl, and it was obvious that they were quarrelling.

  Simon wasn't interested. He was at peace with the world. He concentrated on digging up a small sand castle with his toes and tried to shut them out. And then he heard the girl say: "My God, are you so dumb that you can't see that they must be crooks?"

  It was the word "crooks" that did it. When the Saint heard that word, he could no more have concentrated on sand castles than a rabid egyptologist could have remained aloof while gossip of scarabs and sarcophagi shuttled across his head. A private squabble was one thing, but this was something else that to the Saint made eavesdropping not only pardonable but almost a moral obligation.

  He rolled over and looked at the girl. She was only a few feet from him and even at that range it was easier to go on looking than to look away. From her loose raven hair down to her daintily enamelled toenails there wasn't an inch of her that didn't make its own demoralizing demands on the eye, and the clinging silk swimsuit she wore left very few inches any secrets.

  "Why must they be crooks?" asked the man stubbornly. He was young and tow-headed but the Saint's keen survey traced hard and haggard lines in his face. "Just because I've been out of luck----"

  "Luck I" The girl's voice was scornful and impatient. "You were out of luck when you met them. Two men that you know nothing about, who pick you up in a bar and suddenly discover that you're the bosom pal they've been looking for all their lives--who want to take you out to dinner every night, and take you out fishing every day, and buy you drinks and show you the town--and you talk about luck! D'you think they'd do all that if they didn't know they could get you to play cards with them every night and make you lose enough to pay them back a hundred times over?"

  "I won plenty
from them to begin with."

  "Of course you did! They let you win--just to encourage you to play higher. And now you've lost all that back and a lot more that you can't afford to lose. And you're still going on, making it worse and worse." She caught his arm impulsively and her voice softened. "Oh, Eddie, I hate fighting with you like this, but can't you see what a fool you're being?"

  "Well, why don't you leave me alone if you hate fighting? Anyone might think I was a kid straight out of school."

  He shrugged himself angrily away from her, and as he turned he looked straight into the Saint's eyes. Simon was so interested that the movement caught him unprepared, still watching them, as if he had been hiding behind a curtain and it had been abruptly torn down.

  It was so much too late for Simon to switch his eyes away without looking even guiltier that be had to go on watching, and the young man went on scowling, at him and said uncomfortably: "We aren't really going to cut each other's throats, but there are some things that women can't understand."

  "If a man told him that elephants laid eggs he'd believe it, just because it was a man who told him," said the girl petulantly, and she also looked at the Saint. "Perhaps if you told him----"

  "The trouble is, she won't give me credit for having any sense----"

  "He's such a baby----"

  "If she didn't read so many detective stories----"

  "He's so damned pig-headed----"

  The Saint held up his hands.

  "Wait a minute," he pleaded. "Don't shoot the referee--he doesn't know what it's all about. I couldn't help hearing what you were saying, but it isn't my fight."

  The young man rubbed his head shamefacedly, and the girl bit her lip.

  Then she said quickly: "Well, please, won't you be a referee? Perhaps he'd listen to you. He's lost fifteen thousand dollars already, and it isn't all his own money----"

  "For God's sake," the man burst out savagely, "are you trying to make me look a complete heel?"

  The girl caught her breath, and her lip trembled. And then, with a sort of sob, she picked herself up and walked quickly away without another word.

  The young man gazed after her in silence, and his fist clenched on a handful of sand as if he would have liked to hurt it.

  "Oh hell," he said expressively.

  Simon drew a cigarette out of the packet beside him and tapped it meditatively on his thumbnail while the awkward hiatus made itself at home. His eyes seemed to be intent on following the movements of a small fishing cruiser far out on the emerald waters of the Gulf Stream.

  "It's none of my damn business," he remarked at length, "but isn't there just a chance that the girl friend may be right? It's happened before; and a resort like this is rather a happy hunting ground for all kinds of crooks."

  "I know it is," said the other sourly. He turned and looked at the Saint again miserably. "But I am pigheaded, and I can't bear to admit to her that I could have been such a mug. She's my fiancee--I suppose you guessed that. My name's Mercer."

  "Simon Templar is mine."

  The name had a significance for Mercer that it apparently had not had for Mr Naskill. His eyes opened wide.

  "Good God, you don't mean----You're not the Saint?"

  Simon smiled. He was still immodest enough to enjoy the sensation that his name could sometimes cause.

  "That's what they call me."

  "Of course I've read about you, but----Well, it sort of . . ." The young man petered out incoherently. "And I'd have argued with you about crooks! . . . But--well, you ought to know. Do you think I've been a mug?"

  The Saint's brows slanted sympathetically.

  "If you took my advice," he answered, "you'd let these birds find someone else to play with. Write it off to experience, and don't do it again."

  "But I can't!" Mercer's response was desperate. "She--she was telling the truth. I've lost money that wasn't mine. I've only got a job in an advertising agency that doesn't pay very much, but her people are pretty well off. They've found me a better job here, starting in a couple of months, and they sent us down here to find a home, and they gave us twenty thousand dollars to buy it and furnish it, and that's the money I've been playing with. Don't you see? I've got to go on and win it back!"

  "Or go on and lose the rest."

  "Oh, I know. But I thought the luck must change

  before that. And yet---- But everybody who plays

  cards isn't a crook, is he? And I don't see how they could have done it. After she started talking about it, I watched them. I've been looking for it. And I couldn't catch them making a single move that wasn't above-board. Then I began to think about marked cards-- we've always played with their cards. I sneaked away one of the packs we were using last night, and I've been looking at it this morning. I'll swear there isn't a mark on it. Here, I can show you."

  He fumbled feverishly in a pocket of his beach robe and pulled out a pack of cards. Simon glanced through them. There was nothing wrong with them that he could see; and it was then that he remembered Mr J. J. Naskill.

  "Does either of these birds wear glasses?" he asked.

  "One of them wears pince-nez," replied the mystified young man. "But----"

  "I'm afraid," said the Saint thoughtfully, "that it looks as if you are a mug."

  Mercer swallowed.

  "If I am," he said helplessly, "what on earth am I going to do?"

  Simon hitched himself up.

  "Personally, I'm going to have a dip in the pool. And you're going to be so busy apologizing to your fiancee and making friends again that you won't have time to think about anything else. I'll keep these cards and make sure about them, if you don't mind. Then suppose we meet in the bar for a cocktail about six o'clock, and maybe I'll be able to tell you something."

  When he returned to his own room the Saint put on Mr Naskill's horn-rimmed glasses and examined the cards again. Every one of them was clearly marked in the diagonally opposite corners with the value of the card and the initial of the suit, exactly like the deck that Naskill had given him; and it was then that the Saint knew that his faith in Destiny was justified again.

  Shortly after six o'clock he strolled into the bar and saw that Mercer and the girl were already there. It was clear that they had buried their quarrel.

  Mercer introduced her: "Miss Grange--or you can just call her Josephine."

  She was wearing something in black and white taffeta, with a black and white hat and black and white gloves and a black and white bag, and she looked as if she had just stepped out of a fashion plate. She said: "We're both ashamed of ourselves for having a scene in front of you this afternoon, but I'm glad we did. You've done Eddie a lot of good."

  "I hadn't any right to blurt out all my troubles like that," Mercer said sheepishly. "You were damned nice about it."

  The Saint grinned.

  "I'm a pretty nice guy," he murmured. "And now I've got something to show you. Here are your cards.".

  He spread the deck out on the table and then he took the horn-rimmed glasses out of his pocket and held them over the cards so that the other two could look through them. He slid the cards under the lenses one by one, face downwards, and turned them over afterwards, and for a little while they stared in breathless silence.

  The girl gasped.

  "I told you so!"

  Mercer's fists clenched.

  "By God, if I don't murder those swine----"

  She caught his wrist as he almost jumped up from the table.

  "Eddie, that won't do you any good."

  "It won't do them any good either! When I've finished with them----"

  "But that won't get any of the money back."

  "I'll beat it out of them."

  "But that '11 only get you in trouble with the police. That wouldn't help. . . . Wait!" She clung to him frantically. "I've got it. You could borrow Mr Templar's glasses and play them at their own game. You could break Yoring's glasses--sort of accidentally. They wouldn't dare to stop playing on account of tha
t. They'd just have to trust to luck, like you've been doing, and anyway, they'd feel sure they were going to get it all back again later. And you could win everything back and never see them again." She shook his arm in her excitement. "Go on, Eddie. It 'd serve them right. I'll let you play just once more if you'll do that!"

  Mercer's eyes turned to the Saint, and Simon pushed the glasses across the table towards him.

  The young man picked them up slowly, looked at the cards through them again. His mouth twitched. And then, with a sudden hopeless gesture, he thrust them away and passed a shaky hand over his eyes.

  "It's no good," he said wretchedly. "I couldn't do it. They know I don't wear glasses. And I--I've never done anything like that before. I'd only make a mess of it. They'd spot me in five minutes. And then there wouldn't be anything I could say. I--I wouldn't have the nerve. I suppose I'm just a mug after all. ..."

  The Saint leaned back and put a light to a cigarette and sent a smoke ring spinning through the fronds of a potted palm. In all his life he had never missed a cue, and it seemed that this was very much like a cue. He had come to Miami to bask in the sun and be good, but it wasn't his fault if business was thrust upon him.

  "Maybe someone with a bit of experience could do it better," he said. "Suppose you let me meet your friends."

  Mercer looked at him, first blankly, then incredulously; and the girl's dark eyes slowly lighted up.

  Her slim fingers reached impetuously for the Saint's hand.

  "You wouldn't really do that--help Eddie to win back what he's lost----"

  "What would you expect Robin Hood to do?" asked the Saint quizzically. "I've got a reputation to keep up --and I might even pay my own expenses while I'm doing it." He drew the revealing glasses towards him and tucked them back in his pocket. "Let's go and have some dinner and organize the details."

  But actually there were hardly any details left to organize, for Josephine Grange's inspiration had been practically complete in its first outline. The Saint, who never believed in expending any superfluous effort, devoted most of his attention to some excellent lobster thermidor; but he had a pleasant sense of anticipation that lent an edge to his appetite. He knew, even then, that all those interludes of virtue in which he had so often tried to indulge, those brief intervals in which he played at being an ordinary respectable citizen and promised himself to forget that there was such a thing as crime, were only harmless self-deceptions--that for him the only complete life was still the ceaseless hair-trigger battle in which he had found so much delight. And this episode had everything that he asked to make a perfect cameo.